complexity
Posted by UkraineJane, 27.02.2008, 14:22 in every once in a while i go crazy
it is very curious to be on one side, then to flip, and be on the completely opposite side of things. it's equally curious and thought provoking to be at the top or to be at the bottom, just evokes different emotions.
this song, for example, considers one set of emotions, where i constantly flip from the one who pushes to the one who is pushed. this flipping provides constant entertainment and disruption of stability, which i like but also dislike very much. this does take a lot of energy, i must admit, without giving a place of comfort to rejuvenate.
generally, i am slowly giving in to the complexity of being by welcoming headaches, constant sleepiness and disgust to everything. snatch out or snap. i have a plan of escape, which could potentially result in a much worse troublesome situation. sigh, never satisfied, i hate this complexity (read: stupidity) of the human nature.
stone
Posted by UkraineJane, 02.02.2008, 9:55 in every once in a while i go crazythe rain fell. woke up, showered, brushed my teeth and cleaned my ears. the mechanical one stopped as well.
sinusoid
Posted by UkraineJane, 31.01.2008, 17:42 in every once in a while i go crazy
a typical sine function: started out with yellow roses and dried cherries, ending with Pink Floyd. so silly. the story of my life.
as dav says, i need a dirty wet rug to be stuffed in my face. i agree. i also suggest to myself to eat dirt in these cases 
as always, there is nobody to save the situation. gotta cook something up myself.
revelation
Posted by UkraineJane, 22.01.2008, 13:05 in every once in a while i go crazy
i think i just had a revelation. i think i know what i want to study in grad school. it's not like i did not think of this before, but it has hit me just now. i want to study policy, education within the lines of social policy to be exact.
DUH!
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wanna write about the Woman with Her Throat Cut, but too busy being sick and being at work. enough time to post the preview of the next movie i plan on watching
happiness is a warm gun
Posted by UkraineJane, 17.01.2008, 21:05 in every once in a while i go crazy
having a cheesy-snotty moment here. by degree of bewilderment, this does not qualify as a "long-fingered post." just thinking.
i wonder if others need to care for somebody in order to be happy, i wonder if that is among the top happiness ingredients for others because it is probably number one for me. somehow it seems that the "true love" is like winning lottery, and i have never been too lucky. having somebody to care for, somebody who sees value in it would make a good enough vegetarian duck for me. or so i chose to believe. i dont expect people to care or anything of the kind. at all. so when you asked if i wanted a glass of water, i was stunned.
also, i have been questioning the difference between love, care, passion, attachment and interest in a person. once i try to reason out the difference between all of these, they all blend into one amorphous blob. very confusing i must admit, very confusing.
my mechanical heart has been performing very well: it heats up and cools down just the right amount, it gets controllably sad and happy. all the safety systems are working perfectly well, and though tiny overloads do happen, they are never cutting into the deep, even in the most long-fingered moments (looks like i am quoting myself AGAIN, look at that! 
) a perfectly good heart: i surely should not be complaining. thanks, i guess?
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i hope you are happy whatever that means to you. i really hope so because i would hate to find out that you were not tough enough.
on nightmares suck; partaking in the world leaders forum